Over the last couple of weeks, I have been put in situations where I am learning.  Learning a new way to live.  Learning a new way to believe.  At times, I have had my beliefs and understanding put at odds with others who have had the strongest belief in contrary points of view.  As an issue of truth, two opposing perspectives cannot both be correct, but as an issue of faith… they can be.

Faith is funny.  It doesn’t require a highly developed theological background, nor does it need training at the highest levels of academia.  It is based of the understanding that something is true.  Belief that something is true comes from experience.  I have faith that the next time I sit in my computer chair it will hold me up.  After holding me up for a couple of years, I know it is where I can work, write, dream… and I never question its intentions or ability.  It just is.  We can only possess what we experience. 

But, faith is not based upon fact.  It’s based on something not yet seen, but something that is as real as the ground below me.   

Where does one find faith?  The exploration of that question in my life has led me to strange and wonderful places.  For some people, they find faith in a verse of scripture.  They can see the world in black and white, take truth, accept it, and faith comes.  Other folks, they find faith on the other side of extreme circumstances.  They live through it, and then belief comes.  Truth is always at the heart of either. 

For me, faith is something that is both esoteric and somewhat ethereal.  At times, it comes through an unnatural peace during times when I have no control.  Throughout my time in chemo, I believed that everything would be okay.  The couple of times where I found myself overwhelmed were when I told my loved ones that I had cancer in the first place.  It was easier to have faith than to convince someone else of what I knew in my heart to be true.  God-given faith is often very much what appears to be nonsense in the face of adversity or circumstance.

It’s funny though.  Sometimes I can be told a thousand times that something is true, but it’s not until an arbitrary happenstance drives the point home.  A lingering scent where it doesn’t belong.  A picture that moves into focus.  A sound that recalls times gone past.  Even the juxtaposition of night and day, rain and sun, quiet and din can catch me off-guard enough to get jolted by faith. 

I wish I were more like others who can read scripture and have faith.  For me I have to live through it, and have it creep up and catch me.  Alas, I’m not quite there.  I suppose it’s because I love to have my eyes opened by new and wondrous things.  God knows me so well that He finds places to which only my eyes and ears and nose and heart will be attuned.  So I’m honoured that He remembers me…

“I found faith in the pouring rain
I found faith in a sweet refrain
I found faith in the sermoneer
Until assured I could persevere
I found the Lord when I could not see
Or could it be that the Lord found me….”

—-A.J. Croce

 Where do you find those random reminders of your faith?

or

Where does faith find you?

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